Hate.

Such a strong word. There are a few things that I truly HATE. Cucumbers for instance. HATE. Pumping gas. HATE. Mowing grass. HATE. Going to the dentist. HATE. Yes, I am a sinner. Yes, in my lifetime I have used the word HATE in situations and in the heat of the moment that I regret. But, since finding the love of Jesus Christ and becoming a FULL believer, the word HATE infuriates me. To know someone has hatred in their heart for another human being makes me sad. Not only does it hurt my heart but, it also makes me angry.

I grew up around people with little tolerance when it came to those who were "different" than us. I didn't get it. Heck, I still don't get it for the most part. I understand that the way people view others around them can be generational, I get that it comes from the "era" they were raised in. What I don't get is how it is 2013 and people can still, to this day, have HATE in their heart for people they don't even know. For people that aren't as wealthy as they are, or as white as they are, or for those who are just different than them.

I have spent much of my day today, mad. Really ticked off. I HATE that the negativity of another person has brought this mood on. I HATE that I can't shake it. Jesus says, A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.  John 13:34. He doesn't say, love all the white people but not the brown because you are better. He doesn't say love rich people, not the poor because they worked harder. He says love one another. 

As children, adults would dote over children singing, "Jesus loves the little children, all the children of the world. Red & Yellow, Black & White, they are precious in his sight. Jesus loves the little children of the world." Until that sweet song is put to the test. Then it's Jesus may love all the little children, but my little girl better stay away from that little Yellow Boy! How do you teach your children to love one another and then be a bigot yourself? You think your children don't see that? You think they are blind to your ignorance? No, they are not. They see you & hear you. In the end, when put to the test, they will mimic you. I pray to the Lord that I can set a standard for my daughter to see me being accepting of EVERYONE. I want her to see me in action serving God by my actions, by my prayer and by the way I live my life. 

Today, I should have fallen on my knees and spent the day in prayer. I should have sought out the peace that only God can give. Instead, I sat and got angry. I got upset and mad, then I prayed. Prayer should have been first. 

How can we live in a place where people live their lives completely opposite of what the Bible says?

Fun + Fit + Friends

I need motivation. I need accountability. I need friends. I love my husband. I love my daughter. But, the good Lord knows I need my girl time. As you age (or as I've aged), priorities have changed. Things that were once so important, just really have no substance any more. Like, hanging out with friends at the bar. Yes, I like to have a cocktail now and then but, do I want to be caught up in the cat and mouse hype? Nope. I want an opportunity to see my girlfriends and not have to compete with all the random Joes and that crazy loud music.

I started reading Gabby Reese's book My Foot is Too Big For The Glass Slipper and she talks about the importance of female friendships and fitness. She hosts a weekly fitness group, at no charge, open to women. I've thought about this for a week now, after reading it. I thought, I can freaking do this. I have to do this.

I hired a fabulous personal trainer to work with for a month. Yes, loser, one month. But, I could not wrap myself around spending the extra money on working out. Then, my teeth started falling out my head and I had some extreme dental bills that were a must. So, I had to stop my tri-weekly trainer visits. After that, I've kinda sucked at physical activity...well, that and I really like Mexican food.

Here we are. I've done it. I created a Facebook Group and it's official. A time for women to get fit, meet new people, connect, socialize and share. Positive people working together.

I am pumped.

If you are in my area & want to join.. come on!

Been a Minute...

Hi, my name is Jamie and I'm a codependent, procrastinating, moody, stress eater. I'm also nearly a year late on blogging. What me procrastinate? Nah.

Since my last bloggy post I have gained weight instead of losing it, downsized my business (I'm so bored but, that's another post) and got married! Yes, married. Big girl done walked down the isle in a big ol' white dress. Didn't diet for it, didn't tan, nothing. Planned it in 4 weeks. Guess what, not pregnant either! Ha. I adore my husband. Not only is he my exact match, but he loves my girl. Now, I have two step-daughters and (gasp) a little grandbaby swirl girl. B-a-n-a-n-a-s. I know. Life is good.

So, I'm back on the wagon. The "I need to lose weight and get fit wagon". I swear this weekend I ate so much food I could have vomited. What the heck is wrong with me?? I have the, "I need to clear my plate" syndrome. Seriously, you betta believe when they come pick my plate up off the table, that mug just needs a little wipe down.

I watched a few of those "foodie" documentaries on Netflix and let me tell you, we are eating the most disgusting stuff on the planet. But, why o' why is it so freaking good? I like my saturated poly fatness. Unfortunately, it looks like all that jazz contains cancer causing scariness. Here's my new deal, eat organic and raw as much as possible. No processed, boxed meals. No hormone injected meat. No yummy bag of goodness.

Yesterday began this detoxification of fatness. I made this amazing chicken soup. Never in a million years did I think that a soup with kale in it would be good. It is fabulous. Here's a link to the chicken soup, of course, I found it on Pinterest. Is there a better invention than that? I mean, Pinterest people, I heart you. Anyway, the soup is yummy and filling and makes enough for DAYS.

This morning, I had broiled grapefruit. Another Pinterest find. You can find the details to the grapefruit here. I adjusted it a little and used Stevia instead of brown sugar and maraschino cherry juice and it was still awesome.

I've also added in mass quantities of green tea. Warning, it can be really strong. Add Stevia or honey (honey from your area is best, don't buy the cute grocery store bear honey). I like the flavored green tea.

So, here we go again, reckon how long it will last? Bets?

peace.
j

May..Hey..Yay!

So, I'm over my funk from February... no wonder, I mean it's May. I'm really good at keeping up with blogging...right. I think about it all the time. I've got so much to say, then where on earth does the time go? I swear I wake up at 7 everyday & go to bed around 11 and I still can't seem to finish everything I need to in a day. Surely, I'm not the only person that feels this way? If you have any tips on organizing your day & staying on task...hook me up!

I LOVE to paint, I mean LOVE it. That's what got me hooked on photography, I think, that & this gorgeous FAT baby I had. I haven't painted in years, then a friend of mine asked me to join her at a paint class & I did! Oh, the joy!! I've got me old brush & palette out & started back. I normally prefer canvas or recycled wood to paint on but, recently I decided to get a little whimsical & paint some things for fun. I painted a door hanger for my front door, then one for my sister, then made another one for the Jubilee this weekend. Then, I had to make a wreath to match my balloon hanger for the front door. I'm getting all kinda crafty up in here! The wreaths are made from recycled burlap coffee bags & stuffed with old newspapers - upcycle say what?! I feel my carbon footprint shrinking! Too bad my actual footprint won't shrink, I gots big feet yo. ANYWAY, check it...

As a pro photog, you'd think I could take a little more professional pics but, I'm just loving the ease of the iPhone!

Hope y'all are having an awesome day & WOOOHOOOOO for the last day of SCHOOL!!!!

Hopefully, this won't be the last of me until August!

xoxo
j

A month.

My month has been crazy. I mean absolute and total crazy. Wake up, take girl to school, go to work, get girl from school, cook dinner, clean up, bathe girl, work, sleep. Repeat. Then, throw in go to New Orleans for work. Go to Las Vegas for work. Did I mention I'm planning a wedding too? It's been a wild month to say the least.

Ever want to just throw in the towel? Whether with your job or your relationships or diets or just life in general. Just want to say, forget it, I QUIT? I'm there. Not just with this eating healthy weight loss kick but, with tons of things. I find myself unsatisfied at times. I think it's normal to feel overwhelmed but, when is it not? I have a good life. We are blessed to have our health, a beautiful home (that I adore), tons of gorgeous girls between us (4, but who's counting... that's tons, right?), & we both own our own businesses. (Us, We, Our = Steve & I... he's my significant other, I'm his better half) Anyway, I feel consumed with work. I started photography because I loved it. I loved the idea of preserving memories. I loved the idea of playing with babies as a job and getting paid for it. I also, loved the fact that I got to meet new people on a daily basis. In the past 6 years, I've met the best people, made tons of new friends and watched lots of babies turn into Kindergarteners. Then recently, I have a couple of sour apples. Really rotten apples. Women who obviously were brought up outside the south with no mothers or proper women as role models to guide them through life. I have never felt so degraded & inadequate in my life. People give me rave reviews about their portraits. Gush on about how they look & feel. This one person said one sentence to me that I will never forget. I think about it with every click of the shutter. Anytime I enter a sales session or upload a gallery I think of it. She said, "you are horrible, your work is horrible, your service is horrible." I am horrible. It's been months since this interaction. Yet it still burns to the core of my being. I'm not horrible. I strive to be a good person. I keep to myself mostly. I live a good life. I'm happy but, I keep hearing, "you are horrible." It only takes one person to bring you down.

Well, Horrible Hannah here is going to do all I can do be Happy Hannah. Times are hard. Business is steady, sales are low, the economy stinks. I want to quit but, I have a little life to mold. God has bigger things for me. Quitting is not an option. I'm not one to boast about church or to constantly quote bible verses or be a bible beater but, lately I've found solace in God. I wish each of you could feel what I feel. I'm struggling but, I have this overwhelming feeling of peace that everything will be better.

Try and find your own peace in your own higher power.

Here's to happiness & hoping horrible people find their own peace.

j

Tofu?

Yes. Tofu. Gag. Spongy. Nastiness.

I like it. Swear. Last night I made a rendition of the "not so potato salad" from the link I posted a few weeks ago. It's good. Really Good.

I kind of cheated. The recipe called for stuff that I couldn't find anywhere so, I came up with my own & I used CANNED POTATOES, cheap, fast easy.

Don't hate on my random guesses on how much I used...

1 can diced potatoes
1/2 block of Extra Firm Tofu cubed
fresh parsley & cilantro chopped (probably about 1/4 c)
1 small red bell pepper chopped
1/2 small red onion chopped
olive oil & fat free Italian dressing (maybe 3 T)
Fresh ground Sea Salt & White Pepper (I hate black pepper)

Toss together & refrigerate overnight.

It's great. The tofu takes on the flavor of what it is mixed with & you'd never guess it wasn't a potato. Try it.

Now.

I did it.

It's official. I've done it. There are no more boxed dinner type products in our pantry. Yesterday, the girl and I went shopping for healthy alternatives and talked about how we were going to make better choices about what we snack on and the meals we have at dinner. She's pretty smart for a 6 year old. When she got in from school she says, "so mom what healthy snack are we eating today?" She chose strawberries! Awesome.

Get this... I rode my bike this morning 5.2 miles! Holy crap. I downloaded this app for my iPhone called Cycle Watch and not only did it have a GPS (in case I got lost in my own hood) but, it also kept up with miles, time & how many calories I burned. Surprisingly I did it under 30 minutes...don't know if that is good time or not but, I did it! Supposedly the app posts your results to Facebook but, I didn't see it on my profile...you know it didn't really happen if it wasn't on Facebook!!

I'm currently an app-addict. My awesome neighbor introduced me to Lose It! DOWNLOAD it now! It is so cool! It keeps up with what you eat, tells you how many calories you need to eat daily to lose X amount of weight per week and the coolest thing is that it has a bar-code scanner. You just scan what you are eating and it pops right up! I've been a scanning fool! Even my cheap-o products from ALDI show up! Awesome.

I've got all the tools that I need to get this HOT BODY underway. Motivation. Check. Healthy Food Options. Check. Will Power. Chiggity Check Check. Watch out people, I'm about to get my grove back!

Holla.
j